Seen and Not Reviewed - April 15 to May 30

As many of you loyal readers know, I am not able to review every movie I see (in fact, sometimes I don't even get to half of them). There are a number of things that go into the decision as to whether or not I will write up a full 500-1,500 words on a New Release. To name a few: how much spare time I have at the given moment, how many viewers the review will attract, and how much I have to say about the film in question. I try to devote more time to the reviewing process during the Summer, but even that goal has been a challenge for meas of late. The most prominent reason for this is that I have seen many advanced screenings of future releases and I like to review them before they flee my memory, despite the fact that the reviews won't appear until a week or two before release. Secondly, the impending site redesign is taking up a lot of my time devoted to Bucket Reviews.

Things will likely remain this way until early August. The redesign won't be complete for another two-and-a-half months; I begin taking 5-hour-per-day Summer Classes next week; and I will have the added workload of covering the Los Angeles Film Festival and San Diego Comic Con, respectively, to deal with in June and July. In the meantime, expect me to be able to review about 2-3 "normal" releases per week; they will usually be the big Blockbusters. (For example, this week I will chime in on Sex and the City and The Strangers.) If I feel truly passionate about a smaller picture or think that it will find broad success in the near future, then I might write a full review for it, too.

Because many of you have e-mailed me asking what I think about several recent pictures, I have decided to begin what will be an ongoing 'blog entry. Every two weeks, I will update it with new releases that I have seen but not reviewed. (Of course, you can always head over to my Screening Log to keep up with this on a more regular basis.) Included will be my rating of the film and a 1-2 sentence blurb on my thoughts. Without further adieu, here is my first post of the sort:

88 Minutes (1-1/2 Buckets) - What begins as a mediocre thriller that may provoke an "It's not as bad as they say! Yay!"-type reaction soon turns into a dreadful one that will, indeed, confirm for viewers that it is as bad as the critics have touted by its third act. What a waste of Al Pacino and (to a lesser extent) Leelee Sobleiski's worthy talents.

The Children of Huang Shi (2 Buckets) - The opening few sequences are genuinely fascinating, but this war-set drama tries way too hard for its own good to be a tearjerker. Tacky melodrama seeps out of every inch of the picture despite its noble intentions and several good qualities.

Deal (1 Bucket) - Not exactly unbearable, but not really a movie, either. Poker-fans may find it mildly involving; everyone else will be lost. I wish I could say Burt Reynolds deserved better, but he probably doesn't.

Deception (1-1/2 Buckets) - What begins as an intriguing thriller progressively loses credibility for every minute of its duration until turning into a completely laughable crapfest. Regardless, it admittedly has a keen sense of eroticism and features a daayaaam sexy performance from Michelle Williams.

Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed (2 Buckets) - Ben Stein raises some good points in regards to the academic-shunning of Intelligent Design Theory in this "documentary", but ultimately stoops to using too many Michael Moore-esque tactics to support his central thesis. Had the picture explored I.D. theory itself, it would've likely been more effective. Then again, it's worth a rental for the fact that you get to see Stein trick Richard "The God Delusion" Dawkins into admitting (for a nanosecond) the existence of a Divine Creator.

The Fall (1-1/2 Buckets) - "Either you are drawn into the world of this movie or you are not," Ebert's hot-of-the-presses review reads. I fall into the latter category, to say the least. Director Tarsem carries out the near-impossible task of making a movie more self-indulgent than his single-name moniker.

The Forbidden Kingdom (2-1/2 Buckets) - Rob Minkoff's latest picture doesn't have quite the same ability to balance goofy cartoonishness and mythical folklore as his last effort, The Haunted Mansion, did. Nevertheless, with Jet Li and Jackie Chan supporting promising young actor Michael Argarano in the lead, how could one really go wrong?

Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay (0 Buckets) - This sequel has made the impossible possible by being worse than the original. Not only do leads John Cho and Kal Penn deserve more, so do American moviegoers. That this trash, which will undoubtedly provoke teenagers to become addicted to marijuana in its deliberate glamorization of the drug, is allowed to be released with a mere R-rating is disturbing.

How the Garcia Girls Spent Their Summer (3 Buckets) - This wonderful film, which boasts three wonderful performances and a natural understanding of everyday American life, may end up the most criminally-underlooked film of the year. I wanted to review it in full, but given that it was gone from most theatres in less than a week, I barely had the chance.

Made of Honor (1 1/2 Buckets) - Starts off OK, but quickly descends into common romantic-comedy-inanity-ville. I gotta say, though: this may be the first time I haven't hated Patrick Dempsey in a leading role.

OSS 117: Cairo, Nest of Spies (3 Buckets) - If the upcoming Get Smart is even half as funny as this similar spy-parody, I'll be in heaven. Big laughs aplenty--especially during a hilarious beach-set paddle-ball sequence--this picture is a true gem.

Redbelt (2-1/2 Buckets) - You won't find a bigger David Mamet fan than me, but even I'm not crazy about the guy when he isn't spouting his trademark spicy-hot dialogue, as is the case in this picture. It's overcomplicated and, in the end, highly unsatisfying. Good work from Chiwetel Ejiofor and (particularly) Emily Mortimer, though.

Roman de Gare (3 Buckets) - French auteur Claude Lelouch deliberately toys with his audience's perceptions, and to a surprising degree of success at that. Great performances all around, too.

The Ruins (1-1/2 Buckets) - Lazy, dumb, and wholly predictable horror with the added so-bad-it's-good bragging-rights of villains coming in the form of vicious plants. Jena Malone is decent as our central damsel-in-distress but, then again, looking like she does, how could she not strike me in a favorable manner?

Son of Rambow (3 Buckets) - A sweet, everyday fairy-tale from Garth Jennings, who (somewhat peculiarly) also directed 2005's The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Non-professional child-stars Bill Milner and Will Poulter deliver career-making performances.

Standard Operating Procedure (3 Buckets) - Errol Morris' latest doc on the Abu-Grahib scandal is much too long and sprawling for its own good, but nonetheless stands as one of the few unbiased and entirely-fascinating films made about the War on Terror. Through a simple desire to understand the photos taken at the now-infamous torture site and the willingness to provide his subjects a financial incentive to candidly discuss them, Morris captures some great stuff.

Under the Same Moon (2-1/2 Buckets) - Despite the fact that it's a dead-wrong and dangerous mouthpiece for an Open Southern Border in the United States, the movie is nevertheless emotionally-involving in terms of its narrative and its tremendous performances by Kate del Castillo and Adrian Alonso.

The Visitor (3 Buckets) - Thomas McCarthy's follow-up to The Station Agent isn't as relaxed or as downright warm as that great film was, but it's deserving unto its own. Richard Jenkins gives an unbelievably affecting lead performance by an aging professor who discovers two illegal immigrants living in his long-vacant Manhattan apartment when traveling on business. What unfolds is rich and thought-provoking, even for those of us who dislike the movie's leftist political stance on the immigration-issue.

Where in the World is Osama bin Laden? (1 Bucket) - I want to like Morgan Spurlock. I really do. But when he goes abroad and does things like, oh, try to paint the Israeli-Palestinian conflict into a propaganda-piece in favor of the Palestinians, his likability-factor seems to drop in my book. That the central point of his near-two-hour-long film is to prompt viewers to sing "Kumbahyah" and ask "Why can't we all just get along?" makes it all the worse. At least Michael Moore has the decency to recognize the fact that he's a liberal nutcase in his films.

Zombie Strippers (1-1/2 Buckets) - "It's Jenna Jameson and Robert Englund hamming it up for the camera! How could the movie go wrong?" I thought to myself. Well, turns out it had a lot of ways to do so, not the least of which was decide to turn itself into an out-of-place anti-Bush polemic... Most of all, though, the movie is B-o-r-i-n-g. Still, marginally better than Rodriguez' Planet Horror as far as grindhouse-recreations go.